FV101: Aggressions
by Fifth Voyager
Summary: First episode of the old main series: Janeway mysteriously gets pregnant with Chakotay's child, meanwhile the new writers try to make themselves at home and cause chaos.
1. Chapter 1

Aggressions

**Episode Synopsis**  
Janeway mysteriously gets pregnant with Chakotay's child, meanwhile the new writers try to make themselves at home and cause chaos.

**Please Note**  
This season was written back in 2000/2001, five/six years before B4FV Season Three. You'll find the episodes shorter and a little more, um.. crazy. If you don't like the first few just hang in there, after episode 10 or so it starts to improve (with the exception of the episodes Muse, World Domination and Prepare For Trouble - Once you're in Season Two you'll be fine)

**Guest Stars**  
John De Lancie as Q  
?? as Simon  
?? as Johnathan  
?? as Scott

**Written By**  
Marill & Firera

**Written**  
3rd December 2000

**Episode Based In**  
July 2372 (mid season 3)

**The Bridge:**  
It was a seemly normal day on the Bridge. Tom Paris is sitting at his station having a conversation with Harry Kim, who's also at his own station across the Bridge. Tuvok is at his console at the opposite end of the Bridge to Harry. Chakotay is in his usual place, his command chair. But for a change he wasn't fiddling with the computer on his right side.

"So, Harry are you ready for the luau?" Tom asked as he turned away from his console to face Harry. Harry was still in another world. "HARRY!" Tom yelled. Harry jumped.

"What?" Harry exclaimed.

"I was asking if you are ready to go to the luau?" Tom asked.

"Maybe, I'm just going to talk to B'Elanna," Harry stuttered. Harry walked away from his station and headed for the turbo lift. Chakotay also stood up and headed for the Ready Room.

"Tuvok, you have the bridge," Chakotay said.

"Yes, Commander," Tuvok replied.

**The Ready Room (several days ago):**  
Q was sitting on the chair with a baby boy in his lap. The child was wearing a Starfleet Uniform. Kathryn was standing, facing him.

"I'd say fatherhood agrees with you," Kathryn said.

"Well I'll admit, I look at the universe in an entirely different way now. I mean I can't go around causing temporal anomalies and subspace inversions, without considering the impact it will have on my son," Q said as he shifted his attention to the boy on his lap.

"I'm glad to here that you're setting a good example," Kathryn said with a smile.

"By the way, did I tell you how smart he is. I've already taught him how to knock small planets out of orbit," Q said.

"And I thought you were going to teach him about love and a conscience," Kathryn said.

"Oh, that's why we want Aunty Kathy to be the God mother, now don't we?" Q said to his son.

"I'm honored."

"Yeah, well. Just wait until we ask you and Chuckles to babysit. You can't leave the little guy alone for a nanosecond."

Q stood up still holding the baby.

"Well it's time to be going. The old ball and chain really hates when we're late. Well good bye, Kathy, good luck with old Chuckles," Q said. He looks at the baby. "Now say bye bye," he said to his son. Q gently rose the baby's hand up in a wave. "Bye bye!"

Q and Q Junior disappeared in a flash of light.

**Holodeck 2 (The Beach Resort) The present:**  
"Commander, haven't you got a date for the luau?" Tom asked with a big grin on his face.

"What's it to you, Paris? Haven't you got a date?" Chakotay replied.

"I was going to ask B'Elanna, but she went off with Vomit," Tom replied while taking a drink.

"Vomit?" Chakotay asked.

"Ensign Vorik, Chakotay. Don't you know that's the nickname that's been spreading around the ship?" Tom replied.

"Now I know, it's not nice, Tom," Chakotay said.

"Hey don't look at me, I didn't start the nickname thing," Tom said loudly.

"Then who did?" Chakotay asked.

"Probably Harry," Tom said.

"I don't think so, Tom, he hasn't been saying a thing for days now," Chakotay said.

"Yeah...er, look there's Lieutenant Anderson, I'll go and talk to him. I bet he hasn't got a date, he never has," Tom said quickly and he ran over to a young lieutenant with blonde short hair. "Hi, Craig!" Tom said loudly.

"Oh hi Tom," Craig Anderson replied.

"I take it you don't have a date," Tom said suddenly. Craig looked shocked.

"Not yet," Craig replied with a grin. He pulled out his usual PADD. "There must be some girl who is on her own," Craig said.

"Craig, lets face it, you will never get a date, nobody likes you except me, but I don't want to go out with you," Tom said. Craig looked hurt.

"There's always a first time. Anyway, I'm only into one kind of girl," Craig said.

"All of them," Tom said. Craig gave Tom his version of the death glare.

"No. I like girls with short black or light brown hair," Craig said. Tom started to feel uneasy.

"Why? Isn't that two kinds of girls," Tom heard himself say.

"Whatever," Craig muttered. Tom started to walk away.

"I'll be going, I've just remembered that I have to talk to them," Tom said as he pointed to three young ensigns. Craig sighed as Tom walked away. He thought he should be used to having no one to talk to.

Tom walked up to Ensigns Simon, Johnathan Wilson and Scott.

"Hi, guys, enjoying yourself," Tom said.

"Yeah," Simon replied in his usual dodgy accent. Johnathan nodded with a grin. Scott looked unhappy.

"What's wrong, Scott?" Tom asked. Scott was just about to reply when he and Tom noticed Simon & Johnathan gawping at someone not far away. Tom & Scott turned to face what Simon & Johnathan where looking at.

Kathryn had entered the holodeck. Her hair was down but it had been cut to her shoulders. Craig noticed and he fiddled with his PADD. Tom noticed Craig and shook his head. Tom ran over to Chakotay who hadn't noticed her arrival.

"Hey, Commander, I think your date has arrived," Tom said.

"What are you talking about, Paris?" Chakotay asked.

"You can't fool me. The Captain has arrived and I think she's looking for you," Tom said. Right on cue, Kathryn had walked up to the pair.

"Hi, Tom, Chakotay," Kathryn said.

"Hi, Captain," Tom said, he turned to Chakotay. "I think I'll leave you two alone," Tom said to Chakotay. Tom walked away.

"Kathryn, what have you done to your hair?" Chakotay said with a smile.

"I cut it," Kathryn replied.

"I know, but why?" Chakotay said.

"It was starting to get in the way," Kathryn replied.

"So this is why you're late?" Chakotay said.

"Sorry," Kathryn said. Chakotay notice Craig looking at them. Craig noticed he had been spotted and he quickly walked off.

"Shall we?" Chakotay asked as he held his arm out. Kathryn smiled as she put her arm around his.

**0100 hours:**  
Nearly everyone had left. Only a few people were left, Kathryn, Chakotay, Tom, Craig & two other couples. Tuvok & Marayna was on the other side of the holodeck, out of sight. The two other couples were drunk and they walked out of the holodeck at different moments in a space of five minutes.

Craig was sitting at a table with a drink. Tom was a little drunk and he walked over to Craig's table.

"Hi, Craig," Tom said with a slurry voice. Craig jumped.

"Oh, hi, Tom," Craig said. Tom reached over and stole Craig's PADD. "No, don't look at that!" Craig exclaimed.

"Hey, watch it! B'Elanna's on the list, so you'd better keep away from my B'E," Tom said loudly in a slurry voice as he collapsed into a chair.

"You're drunk," Craig muttered as he took the PADD back.

"LIAR!" Tom yelled, " prove it, damn it!"

"For starters, sober people don't talk in a slurry voice," Craig said.

"You do though," Tom replied.

"No I don't," Craig said.

"DO!" Tom yelled.

"Don't."

"DO!"

"Don't."

Suddenly there was a thud. Tom had fell off his chair. Craig rolled his eyes and stood up. He started to head for the holodeck doors.

"See you tomorrow, Tom," Craig said. Tom struggled to get up.

"Oh fine! I'll go bug Captain Kathy and Commander Chak," Tom said with an even slurrier voice than before.

**Meanwhile:**  
Kathryn and Chakotay were sitting on one of the sofa type chairs. Suddenly Kathryn stopped talking and she looked around.

"Hey where's everyone gone?" Kathryn asked.

"Kathryn, it's 0100 hours, they're probably in bed by now," Chakotay replied.

"Is it that time already!" Kathryn exclaimed. Chakotay nodded. "You know this is all your fault."

"Why's that?" Chakotay asked.

"You're too distracting," Kathryn laughed.

"In what way?" Chakotay asked.

"You know what I mean," Kathryn said.

"I'm afraid I don't," Chakotay said.

Kathryn moved closer to him. Suddenly they both felt an arm around their shoulders.

"HI, CAPTAIN, COMMANDER!" Tom yelled in their ears from behind them. "HAVING FUN?" he asked.

"Not now," Chakotay said.

"HUH! HOW RUDE! I KNOW WHEN I'M NOT WELCOME, SO I'LL STAY HERE WITH YOU, COZ I KNOW YOU BOTH LOVE ME," Tom yelled. Luckily for them, he collapsed behind the sofa.

"Do you think he's had too much to drink?" Chakotay laughed.

"Who cares about him," Kathryn said.

"I HEARD THAT, DAMN IT! OH S I CAN'T GET BACK UP!" Tom yelled as he fell unconscious.

"What were you going to say, Kathryn?" Chakotay asked. Kathryn looked puzzled.

"Say?" she said in a puzzled voice as she leaned closer to him. She kissed him briefly on the lips. "Sorry," she said and she got up and left the holodeck. Chakotay got up and followed her. Tom was still lying unconscious on the floor.

5 minutes later, Tuvok walked out of the holodeck and deactivated the program with Tom still lying on the floor.

**0800 hours:**  
Tom woke up with a splitting headache.

"What the hell am I still doing in the holodeck?" he asked himself.

_"Janeway to Paris_."

"Er...yes Captain?" Tom asked.

_"Why aren't you on the Bridge, you duty shift starts now."_

"Oh sorry, I'm on my way," Tom said. He totally forgot that he still had his luau clothes on.

**2 days later:**  
Shuttle Sacajawea left the shuttle bay doors and headed out into space. A few minutes later a planet was in sight.

On the shuttle, Kathryn was sitting in the co-pilots seat and Chakotay sat down in the pilots seat. They hadn't spoken since the luau incident.

"Kathryn, can I ask you something?" Chakotay asked finally. She nodded.

"Why did you apologise for what happened on the holodeck?" he asked.

"Because I don't know what came over me," Kathryn muttered.

"I still don't understand why you apologized though," Chakotay said. Kathryn was about to reply when something hit the shuttle.

"Atmospheric turbulence, we may be in for a rough landing," Chakotay said.

"But there was no evidence of rough weather before," Kathryn said.

"I'm reading even more severe storms near the surface," Chakotay said. A strike of lightning hit the shuttle.

"Ion lightning, maybe we should try the 5th planet instead, come back here when it's cleared up," Kathryn said. Another few lightning strikes hit the shuttle.

"We took another lightning hit, altitude control is out," Chakotay said.

"I'm switching to manual," Kathryn said. A larger lightning strike hit the shuttle.

"The navigational system is down!" Chakotay said.

"Reverse engines, full thrusters!" Kathryn ordered.

_"Warning! Hydrosene gas leak," the computers voice._

"Altitude 12 kilometers, full temperature 4000 degrees, we have to reduce speed," Kathryn said.

"I'll try the emergency anit-graph thrusters," Chakotay said.

The shuttle swerved backwards and forwards, out of control until it finally hit the surface.

Chakotay woke up with a violent headache. He rose from the console and looked around. He started to panic when he didn't see Kathryn anywhere. He turned behind him and there she was, lying on the floor, maybe unconscious? Chakotay climbed out of the chair, the headache kicked in, in full force when he did. He knelt over her.

"Kathryn?" he said, he checked her pulse, it was very faint. His headache grew worse but he didn't care. "Kathryn!" He tried to get her to wake up, but she wouldn't even move. He quickly went over to the Med Kit and he opened it. He took a tri-corder out and scanned her. The tri-corder bleeped furiously. "No!"

_"Warning: hydrosene gas levels at dangerous high levels, begin evacuation procedures," the computer said._

He stood up and opened the shuttle doors. He put the Med Kit over his shoulder, and he gently dragged Kathryn out of the shuttle. He put his arms underneath her legs and waist, and he picked her up.

The storm was getting worse. Chakotay desperately tried to find shelter. He wandered around for a few seconds, and he put her down. He pulled the Med-Kit off his shoulder and opened it. He quickly slammed it closed again.

**Meanwhile on Voyager:**  
"Lieutenant, I can't detect the Captains shuttle anymore," Harry said.

"Maybe they've already gone out of sensor range," Tom said.

"Unlikely," Tuvok said. He walked up to Harry's console. "What was their last location?"

"The fourth planet of the system," Harry replied.

"But that's inside our sensor range, isn't it?" Tom asked.

"Indeed. Mr Paris set a course for the 4th planet, full impulse. Mr Kim, inform me when we're in communication range," Tuvok said.

"Aye Sir," Harry & Tom said in unison.

"I can't get a lock on the Captain or Chakotay," Craig said from Tuvok's console.

"Lieutenant, we're in range," Harry said.

"Very good, Ensign. Voyager to Sacajawea," Tuvok said.

_"Yes, Voyager. How far are you? We have an emergency here."_

Tom gave Harry a shocked look. Harry looked shocked as well. They could tell by Chakotay's voice that something bad had happened to the Captain.

"We're in orbit, Commander, we can't get a lock on you, we'll send a shuttle down to the surface," Tuvok said.

_"The Captain's dead, we have to bring her to Sickbay."_

Harry's eyes widened, he was right. Tom looked totally shocked. Craig looked like he was ready to cry.

"Acknowledged, Commander, we're on our way," Tuvok said. He started heading for the turbo lift. "Mr Paris go to Sickbay and inform the Doctor to meet me in Shuttle bay 1, Anderson, you have the Bridge," Tuvok said. Tom followed him. Harry gave Craig a mean look as Craig still looked shocked.

"Aye Sir," he said finally.

The Doctor and Tuvok left the shuttle. "Tuvok to Chakotay," Tuvok said.

_"Tuvok, where are you!"_

"I was about to ask you the same question, Commander," Tuvok said.

"Wait a minute, I see the other shuttle," the Doctor said.

"We're on our way now Commander," Tuvok said.

_"Good, we're not far away from the shuttle."_

Tuvok & the Doctor made their way to the shuttle. They looked around.

"Lieutenant, I've found them," the Doctor said. The pair headed towards Chakotay who was holding Kathryn's stiff hand. They walked up to him. The Doctor opened his Med-Kit and he took out some equipment.

"Commander, are you all right?" Tuvok asked, noting the scar on Chakotay's head. The Doctor scanned Kathryn.

"I'm fine, but Kathryn's not," Chakotay said. Tuvok raised his eye brow at Chakotay's use of the Captains first name.

"This is strange, I'm detecting an alien parasite in her cerebral cortex," the Doctor said.

"What! How's that possible?" Chakotay asked.

"I don't know," the Doctor said, he was already getting sick of Chakotay.

"Will you be able to remove it, Doctor," Chakotay asked. The Doctor sighed, he continued to work by ignoring Chakotay.

"Commander, may I speak with you?" Tuvok asked.

"This better be important," Chakotay muttered. Tuvok & Chakotay stood up and walked away, giving the Doctor some quiet.

"Commander, I know that you're upset, but irritating the Doctor isn't going to help her," Tuvok said.

"Commander! Lieutenant!" the Doctor suddenly yelled. Tuvok & Chakotay quickly walked back to the Doctor and they knelt down. "I've got a weak pulse," the Doctor said.

"She's coming back," Chakotay said.

"I'll use cordaseen along with the simulator," the Doctor said. The Doctor continued to work. Kathryn's eyes started to open.

"Her eyes are opening," Chakotay said.

"Vital signs are responding, blood pressure, 60 over 30," the Doctor said.

"But the entity is still inhabiting her cerebral cortex, impeding your treatment," Tuvok said.

"Kathryn, hang on, we're bringing back, just fight it a little longer," Chakotay said.

"Directive synaptic stimulation might drive out the alien presence," the Doctor said.

**Two minutes later:**  
"Something's happening, the alien presence is getting stronger again," the Doctor said.

"Fight it, Kathryn, fight it just a little longer," Chakotay said.

"Ill have to try a phoron pulse," the Doctor said. The Doctor picked up a medical instrument and he started using it on Kathryn. A few minutes later, Kathryn started to wake up, the Doctor scanned her.

"Kathryn?" Chakotay said.

"I'm no longer detecting the alien presence, vital signs are responding, blood pressure 110 over 65," the Doctor said. Kathryn woke up.

"Doctor, what happened?" Kathryn asked quietly. The Doctor and Chakotay smiled.

"Perhaps you can explain Commander," the Doctor said.

"You and I were caught in a magnetic storm, and crashed here. You were badly injured. The Doctor has just arrived on a shuttle with Tuvok and began treating you," Chakotay said.

"As he was doing so, we detected an alien presence in your cerebral cortex, it appeared to be preventing our attempts to heal you."

"Eventually it was dislodged but there were a number of times we'd thought we lost you," the Doctor said.

"But each time you kept fighting back," Chakotay said. Kathryn tried to sit up, Chakotay and Tuvok helped her.

"He kept telling me to let go but I wouldn't," Kathryn said.

"He?" Tuvok asked.

"My father...the alien, it wanted to take me to another place," Kathryn replied.

"Another place. Some kind of afterlife?" Chakotay asked.

"Maybe, but I can tell you this, it certainly didn't look like a place I would want to spend eternity," Kathryn said. Chakotay helped her stand up. Tuvok and the Doctor also stood up. The Doctor picked up his Med Kit. Kathryn, Chakotay & Tuvok started heading for the shuttle. Chakotay put his arm around Kathryn's waist, she put her hand on his shoulder.

**Sickbay:**  
The Doctor was scanning Kathryn on the bio bed. Chakotay was standing near by. Kes was standing next to the Doctor.

"Hmm," the Doctor mumbled.

"What?" Kathryn asked. Kes & Chakotay looked puzzled. The Doctor looked at Chakotay.

"Commander, may I see you in my office?" the Doctor asked. Chakotay gave Kathryn a puzzled look.

"All right," Chakotay replied. The Doctor walked towards his office, Chakotay followed.

"Kes, do you have any idea what that was all about?" Kathryn asked.

"No idea, Captain," Kes replied. "You'll probably find out eventually."

"I hope so," Kathryn said. Chakotay and the Doctor walked out of the office.

"What was that all about?" Kathryn asked. The Doctor nodded at Chakotay.

"I don't know how to tell you this, Kathryn but... you're pregnant... with my child," Chakotay muttered.

**TO BE CONTINUED**


	2. Chapter 2

Aggressions

**Guest Stars**  
Marill as herself  
Firera as herself  
Raichu as herself  
Vulpix as herself  
Desmond Harrington as Damien  
?? as The Old Man  
?? as Riley Frasier  
Nancy Hower as Samantha Wildman  
Scarlett Pomers as Naomi Wildman

**Please Note**  
This season was written back in 2000/2001, five/six years before B4FV Season Three. You'll find the episodes shorter and a little more, um.. crazy. If you don't like the first few just hang in there, after episode 10 or so it starts to improve (with the exception of the episodes Muse, World Domination and Prepare For Trouble - Once you're in Season Two you'll be fine). This part you'll see what I mean.

**Written By**  
Marill & Firera

**Written**  
17th December 2000

**Edited**  
30th November 2003

**Episode Based In**  
July 2372 to March 2373

**Last time on** **Fifth** **Voyager**  
On a shuttle mission, Kathryn & Chakotay's shuttle was caught in a storm and it crashed landed on a deserted planet. Kathryn died. Voyager came to the rescue. The Doctor discovered an alien parasite in Kathryn's cerebral cortex, luckily Kathryn fought back against it and she recovered. Once scanned in Sickbay the Doctor discovered that she is somehow pregnant with Chakotay's child.

**And now the conclusion**  
**Sickbay:**  
"But...how?" Kathryn stuttered. The Doctor gave her a puzzled look.

"Well, it all starts when..." the Doctor started blabbering.

"Doctor!" Chakotay exclaimed.

"Oh of course, you know all that already," the Doctor said. Kes tried not to laugh. Kathryn gave the Doctor the 'deathglare.' The Doctor looked scared.

"I think she means how could it of happened when we haven't... er... you know," Chakotay said quietly.

"Oh, I get it! Well if that's the situation then I don't know how it could of happened," the Doctor said.

"Maybe we should evaluate those scans again, Doctor," Kes suggested. The Doctor nodded and they both headed for the Doctor's office.

"Well, any bright ideas?" Kathryn asked.

"Nope. It maybe just what people call a miracle," Chakotay said.

"A miracle!" Kathryn exclaimed.

"Kathryn, it's not that bad, you know," Chakotay said quietly.

"That's easy for you to say, you don't have to put up with anything," Kathryn said huffily.

"Yes I do, I'll have to put up with you complaining about not having enough coffee," Chakotay said.

"Huh?"

"The Doctor said that you'll have to cut down to one cup of coffee a day," Chakotay said as he got ready to duck.

"What!" Kathryn yelled.

"I'm sure you can live with decaffeinated," Chakotay said quietly. Suddenly the doors opened and this strange girl with brown hair walked in.

"Okay, I'm sure we can fast forward through this next bit," she said as she pulled out a note pad and pen. The doors opened again and a younger girl with dark red hair walked in.

"No! Don't do that!" she exclaimed.

"Hey, we agreed that I write this scene," the first girl said.

"But you're doing a crap job of it!" the second girl exclaimed.

"Because it's not my kind of scene," the first girl said angrily.

"Well you can do the scenes that are based on the episode Scorpion, and remember don't kill anyone or have lots of blood all over the place!" the second girl said angrily.

"Since when do you decide everything?" the first girl asked.

"Shut up! Anyway I have a brilliant idea to finish this teaser that'll please you and me," the second girl said.

"How are you going to do that?" the first girl asked.

"Just watch and see," the second girl said.

"Do I have too?" the first girl moaned. The doors opened again and a strange old man walked in. The two girls looked frightened.

"What the hell is going on?" Kathryn asked.

"Hello everybody, I'm the Old Man, I remember when I first came into other peoples stories. I woke up in the morning and I made a piece of toast, which in those days..." the Old Man blabbered on.

"Firera, did you write this?" the first girl asked with the Old Man blabbering on in the background.

"No, Marill, did you?" Firera replied as the Old Man finally got past the bit with the toast.

"No, so who did?" Marill asked.

"Who else," Firera moaned. Right on cue a strange looking guy walked into Sickbay, holding two toy rabbits.

"Hello everybody!" the guy yelled. Suddenly Marill & Firera collapsed in animé (Pokémon) style. The Old Man continued to blabber on. Firera & Marill got back up.

"Damien, what are you doing here!" Marill yelled.

"It's not Damien, it's Mewtwo, the ultimate Pokémon," Damien said with a deep voice and with his left arm over his mouth. Suddenly the Pokémon song, Together Forever, came on, just when Misty & Ash were arguing.

Firera mimicked Brock from the song, "ohno not this again!" Pikachu's voice said, "Pika-chu," then the music went off.

"Damien will you go away!" Marill yelled.

"Why should I?" Damien said.

"Coz, we don't like you," Firera yelled.

"Oh fine, but we'll be back," Damien said. Suddenly he and the Old Man disappeared.

"Right, we can get on with the teaser," Firera said.

"Lets get it over with...oh crap we've ran out of time. Oh well here's the credits animation," Marill moaned.

"There is no credits animation," Firera said.

"Shut up, this was not in the original episode!" Marill yelled.

"Whatever, just delete your credits animation line and get on with the episode," Firera said. She walked away.

"Why bother," Marill muttered.

**Sickbay (where we left off):**  
Marill & Firera stepped out of sight, behind the console. Kathryn & Chakotay continued to talk.

"Well this is interesting," Marill muttered.

"Shut up," Firera said quietly. The pair must of missed something because the other pair started to get closer. Firera looked at Marill who was pretending to be sick. Suddenly a mallet appeared out of no where so Firera whacked Marill on the head with it.

Some boring music came on but...Tuvok had walked in just before anything happened and the music cut off.

"Tuvok, what are you doing here?" Kathryn said.

"I wanted to see if you were all right," Tuvok replied.

"So this is your brilliant idea," Marill muttered while rubbing her head.

"It's like SMTV Live, you know in Chums. Dec and Cat are always interrupted when they're about to kiss. I thought we can do something similar in nearly every episode," Firera replied.

"Oh, that's good, that means there will be no soppiness," Marill said.

"Sort of. C'mon lets go," Firera said.

"Okay, lets get on with the next scene!" Marill said happily. Firera & Marill disappeared.

**The Conference Room** **(the dreaded Unity episode):**  
Everyone was sitting at the table. For some strange reason, Craig was sitting at the table too. Probably because he's now a main character.

"Commander, you and Ensign Kaplan take Shuttle Sacajawea on some sort of stupid mission," Kathryn said.

_"Stupid mission?" Firera's voice said._

_"Well if you're the expert, tell me why Chakotay takes a shuttle out in the first place," Marill's voice said._

_"I don't know, just make one up," Firera's voice said._

""Commander, you and Ensign Kaplan take Shuttle Sacajawea to look for some dilithium," Kathryn said.

_"But they always seem to do that!" Firera's voice yelled._

_"Can you think of a better idea?" Marill's voice said._

_"What about a survey mission," Firera's voice said._

_"No, I've just thought of one," Marill's voice said._

"Commander, you and Ensign Kaplan take Shuttle Sacajawea so you can crash it and then we can get some more insurance so we can finally build the cool Delta Flyer," Kathryn said.

_"Marill! What insurance!!" Firera's voice yelled._

_"Oh chill Firera, it was only a joke. He, he, he_, _the Delta Flyer, it's so cool!" Marill's voice laughed._

_"Just use the survey mission excuse and for crying out loud don't mention either the Delta Flyer or_ _the Enterprise E_!_" Firera's voice yelled._

_"He, he, he, he, the Enterprise E, it kicks butt and it looks so cool! Ooooh, if Riker blows that ship up too I'll kill him in the next episode_,_" Marill's voice said._

"Commander, you and Ensign Kaplan take Shuttle Sacajawea on a survey mission to several planets in the Negretive Expanse," Kathryn said.

"Yes ma'am," Chakotay said.

"And don't crash it again!" Tom joked.

"Shut up, Paris!" Chakotay threatened.

"Yeah, that was only two episodes ago," Craig said.

_"Er Marill, problem. Number One: Craig shouldn't know that this is a program and not real life. Number Two: I'm sure Shuttle Sacajawea was left behind in Coda," Firera's voice said._

_"Hey, this is my scene I can write what I want. Anyway this is the fifth dimension so the shuttle could of been recovered. Craig's remark was a joke, so loosen up!" Marill's voice said angrily._

"Captain, it isn't a good idea for Commander Chakotay to leave Voyager. You can easily fall ill. If that would happen, he has to take command of Voyager," Tuvok said in his boring voice.

"I hate to say this, but Tuvok is right," B'Elanna said.

"I volunteer to go in his place," Tom said.

"Yeah and I'll go in Ensign Kaplan's place," B'Elanna said.

"Why?" Kathryn asked.

"I haven't left the ship in ages," B'Elanna replied.

"But you were off the ship in the last episode," Chakotay said.

"Not exactly, in this Fifth Voyager episode the events in Blood Fever didn't happen," B'Elanna said. Tom looked huffy.

"But it must of coz you remember it," Harry said.

"Remember what?" B'Elanna lied.

"Fine, Tom, B'Elanna, take shuttle Sacajawea on the survey mission," Kathryn said.

**On the planet (instead of the boring/soppy scene):**  
"What are you talking about, B'Elanna?" Tom asked.

"That Riley was always next to you and touching you when you were asleep," B'Elanna said angrily.

_"Eeew, in what way, Firera?" Marill's voice said._

_"Oh shut up, Marill. She was probably just touching_ _his face or something, now lets get on with the episode,"_ _Firera's voice replied._

"If she was, why would you care?" Tom asked.

"Er...if you must know, I care about you," B'Elanna stuttered.

"Oh, I see. Does that mean you..." Tom said.

"Yes I suppose it does!" B'Elanna interrupted.

"So you do love me?" Tom said.

"Er.. um I suppose so," B'Elanna said. Riley walked up to the pair.

_"Oooh, I hate that Riley. She's so girly and her voice_ _annoys the hell out of me!" Marill's voice said._

_"Don't worry_ _sh_e _gets hurt at some point," Firera's voice said._

"So, how are you feeling, Tom," Riley said in her annoying soft voice.

"Get away from him, you slut!" B'Elanna yelled.

"What are you talking about, B'Elanna?" Riley asked.

_"Ooh, kill her, I can hear her voice!" Marill's voice said._

"I said, you'd better stay away from him! Is there something about that sentence that you don't understand?" B'Elanna yelled.

"But, B'Elanna, I don't know what you mean," Riley said.

_"AAAAGGHH! That's it, give me that_ _pad, I'm going to kill her myself!" Marill's voice yelled._

_"No, leave it, I've nearly finished," Firera's voice said._

"B'Elanna, just leave it," Tom said.

"Ooooh, Riley, you're dead!" B'Elanna yelled as she picked up a dagger that appeared out of nowhere.

_"Marill, give me that pad and pen back!" Firera's voice yelled._

_"Oh, this is annoying!" Marill's voice said._

"B'Elanna, if it wasn't for me, Tom would be dead so put down that dagger," Riley said.

B'Elanna raised the dagger and slashed Riley in the face. Blood poured down her face.

_"Is that all you're going to do, give me that here!" Marill_'s _voice yelled._

Suddenly B'Elanna stabbed Riley in the stomach. Riley dropped to the ground.

"B'Elanna, you've killed her!" Tom exclaimed.

_"Oh Marill, look what you've done!" Firera's voice said._

_"Oh, boohoo!" Marill's voice said_.

**Later on another shuttle (probably the Cochrane):**  
Tom, for some reason, was sitting in the co-pilots seat. B'Elanna was sitting in the pilots seat.

"Are you okay, Tom?" B'Elanna asked.

"Huh?" Tom asked as he sprung back to life.

"I said are you okay," B'Elanna said.

"Oh my god! You killed Riley and your asking me if I'm okay?" Tom exclaimed.

"Oh my god! You sounded like those kids from South Park," B'Elanna exclaimed. Suddenly the wavefile I got off the net started playing.

"We are the Borg we will add your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own." Phaser fire and explosions replaced the Borg's eery voice. "God dammit don't shoot me!" And again. "Ohno!" "Oh my god, they killed Kenny, you b!"

"Okay, that was disturbing," B'Elanna said.

"God, I don't like these new writers," Tom said.

_"WHAT!" Firera_ _yelled._

_"WHAT!" Marill_ _yelled._

Suddenly the Borg voices started talking in Tom's head.

"You see that dagger over there, go and stab yourself with it," the voices said.

_"Is this a dagger I see before me?" Marill's voice said sarcastically._

_"Aaagh! Macbeth! Stop, you're interrupting the 'be nasty to Tom bit'" Firera's voice screamed._

"What did you say, B'Elanna?" Tom asked.

"Do I sound like Borg drones?" B'Elanna asked.

"Yes," Tom said. WHACK!! An iron bar had just appeared out of nowhere so B'Elanna could hit Tom with it. Tom heard the voices again.

"Go to the Borg cube or we will kill you. We can control your mind," the voices said.

"Oh my god, I'm hearing the voices again!" Tom said.

"I see," B'Elanna said..

"This is all those damn writers fault! Especially the one with the red butcher chopped hair!" Tom exclaimed. Suddenly Firera appeared behind Tom. Team Rocket music started playing

"HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY HAIR! PREPARE FOR TROUBLE!" she yelled. Marill appeared with a silly grin on her face.

"It used to be there but now it's stubble," she said. Firera threw a poke ball (that conveniently appears).

"To protect my head from humiliation!" she yelled. Suddenly a purple Cobra appeared.

"Charbok-a!" it hissed. Marill threw another pokeball (that also conveniently appeared).

"To bad her hair went on vacation," she yelled. Suddenly a cute blue mouse appeared.

"Marill, mar-marill!" it squeaked. Firera threw another poke ball.

"My gorgeous hair was my one true love!" she yelled. A yellow mouse appeared.

"Pika!" it squeaked. Marill threw another ball into the air.

"They went together like an hand and glove!" she yelled. A red dragon appeared.

It roared and a flame of fire came out of it's mouth and it hit Sarah. Somehow she was still okay, just a little black.

"Firera," Firera said. Sarah suddenly wasn't black anymore.

"Marill," she said. The two stood facing away from Tom & B'Elanna.

"Now my hair's short but it won't be for long," Firera said as the two turned to face Tom.

"And it wont stop our Fire from killing Tom," Marill said. Suddenly Raichu appeared in front of Firera & Marill.

"Hairy," she said.

"Get lost, Rai!" Firera yelled. Raichu disappeared.

"Who are you two?" B'Elanna yelled.

"Be quiet! I'm getting sick of you!" Firera yelled. Suddenly a phaser appeared in her hand and she shot her.

"Er...Firera, your suppose to kill Tom, not B'Elanna," Marill said.

"I know, she was just getting on my nerves. You're dead Tom!" Firera yelled.

"Why don't we beam him to the Borg cube like in the draft, but he can get assimilated or get shot by the rescue team," Marill said.

"Even better, goodbye Tom," Firera said. Tom disappeared.

"Oh wait, we haven't got much time. We still have to do the scenes from Scorpion, we haven't go the time to finish this scene," Marill said.

"Fine, he can be the one who gets attacked by Species 8472 instead of Harry," Firera said.

**The Bridge (the last one in Part 2):**  
Seven Of Nine walked across the Bridge and faced Kathryn.

"Unacceptable, blah, blah, blah, blah," Seven blabbered on. Neelix ran onto the Bridge.

"Captain, some crewmembers are saying they've been seeing a girl with brown hair and a girl with red short hair wandering around the ship causing trouble," Neelix said. Seven continued to blabber on.

"Oh it's that Firera & Marill again, Neelix. They're just the new writers," Kathryn said. Suddenly Seven stopped talking when the Team Rocket music came on again.

"Oh, this is getting tiring," Tom said.

"Prepare for trouble from a girl with brown hair," Marill's voice said. Firera's head popped out from behind Tom's console.

"And make it double from a girl with chopped red hair," she said. Suddenly Marill appeared from behind the conn.

"To protect Voyager from devastation," she said. Firera jumped up to stand beside her.

"To protect...er...my hair looks alright doesn't it?" she asked.

"To announce the evils of rabbits and love," Marill said.

"To make our site a more popular one," Firera said.

"Marill."

"Firera."

Suddenly a giant 5 appeared on the view screen. Firera fell over as Marill jumped onto her back.

"Fifth Voyager blasts off at warp speed," Marill said. Firera from the floor started moaning.

"Get off, get off!" Firera said but no one understood her, she was all muffled. Suddenly a teenaged girl appeared.

"What's the matter, Fox caught your tongue," she said. Marill lost her balance and fell off Firera's back. Firera sat up from her lying position.

"Vulpix, get lost," she said.

"Oh, sorry, I love the Team Rocket motto," Vulpix said.

"It's not the Team Rocket motto, it's our motto," Marill said.

"No it isn't, the first motto you did was from 'Tracey Gets Bugged' and the last one you did was you own version of the one from 'Make Room For Gloom.' They are all from Pokémon," Vulpix said. Firera got her pad out and started writing. Vulpix disappeared in a flash of light and she appeared on the Isle Of Man.

"Can we just get back to the episode?" Harry asked.

"Oh sure, we just couldn't resist it," Marill said.

"Bye bye, see ya next episode," Firera said. The pair disappeared. Seven walked up to Tom. He fired his phaser but it bounced straight of her Borg shields. She pushed him away from his console and she started assimilating the conn.

"Harry, lock her out," Kathryn ordered.

"I can't," Harry said.

"Janeway to Paris." Tom stood up.

"Yes Captain," he said.

"Tom, you idiot! You are suppose to be in the Cargo Bay!" Kathryn yelled.

"But I thought it was Chakotay...oh yeah I was on that Borg planet... oops sorry, I'll go now!" Tom said. He ran out of the room.

**Ten** **minutes later:**  
"Seven wait a few more minutes," Kathryn said.

"This is irrelevant," Seven said.

_"Paris to Janeway."_

"Alright. Doctor get started," Kathryn said.

_"Yes Captain."_

Seven started talking to herself, "hair is irrelevant"

"Tom, what are you telling her?" Kathryn asked.

_"Ooops, I was telling her she would suit black_ _hair. Sorry I'll get on with what I'm suppose to be doing."_

"Irrelevant Saying that I must of been a cute kid is irrelevant," Seven said.

"TOM!" Kathryn yelled.

_"Sorry, Captain, I couldn't resist it."_

Suddenly Seven screamed and she fell unconscious. Tuvok walked over to her. He scanned her with a tri-corder.

"Her connection to the collective has been severed," Tuvok said.

"Take her to Sickbay," Kathryn said. She herself started to look faint.

"I'll take you too," Chakotay said.

"What! Why?" Kathryn exclaimed.

"You look ill," Chakotay said.

"I'm fine," Kathryn said before she collapsed.

**Sickbay:**  
The Doctor was scanning Kathryn with a tri-corder. Seven was on another bio bed being scanned by Kes. The Doctor walked up to Chakotay.

"If my scans are accurate, she is suffering from psychological trauma, she'll have to stay on light duty," the Doctor said.

"She doesn't even know what that means," Chakotay said.

"True, but she'll have to live with it for the time being," the Doctor said.

**The following day, in the Ready Room:**  
Kathryn was sitting at her desk with a cup of coffee. The door chime sounded.

"Come in," Kathryn said angrily. Chakotay walked in. "What do you want?"

"The Doctor told me to keep checking up on you," Chakotay said.

"Well I'm fine, so you can go away," Kathryn said.

"Why are you angry with me?" Chakotay asked.

"I don't know, now just leave me alone," Kathryn said.

"Wait a minute, how many cups of coffee have you had?" Chakotay asked.

"Three, what's it to you?" Kathryn replied icily.

"The Doctor told you only one cup a day. This is probably why your so irritated," Chakotay said. Kathryn stood up and walked up to him.

"You're starting to sound like my mother, get out!" Kathryn yelled.

"Gladly, but your going back to Sickbay," Chakotay said.

"No, I'm bloody well not!" Kathryn yelled.

**One hour later (at Marill's house):**  
_"Web Express has performed an Illegal Operation!"_

"Son of a bch!" Marill yelled.

**Later that night in Sickbay:**  
Kathryn woke up. She sat up and headed for the console. Sickbay was dark. She noticed a hypospray so she picked it up.

**Meanwhile on the Bridge:**  
"Oooh, I wish that red headed girl would come back," Craig said.

_"Ohno not this again," Firera's voice moaned._

_"Oh c'mon Firera, just pretend we haven't done this scene yet," Marill's voice said._

_"Well can we change it, it'll help a lot," Firera's voice said._

"Who might that be?" Harry asked.

"That writer," Craig said dreamily.

"I thought you only liked black & brown haired girls," Tom pointed out.

"Oh come on Tom, anybody can tell she's not a natural red head," Craig said.

"I don't think you can get a natural red head, the only way you can get your hair dark red is if you dye it," Harry muttered.

"Oh be quiet, that girl's after me because I said she had butchered chopped hair. Goodness knows what she'll do to you because of you saying she's not a natural red head," Tom said.

"_I can't take it any more!" Firera's voice yelled._

_"Not again," Marill's voice moaned._

Firera appeared. Her face matched her hair colour.

"I'm sick of this. This is the second attempt at this scene and your still insulting my hair! Prepare..." Firera said angrily.

"For trouble?" Tom interrupted.

"No, prepare to die!" Firera exclaimed.

"Oh, I love a girl with a bad temper," Craig said dreamily.

"Well go and bother Marill then, she explodes when the computer crashes, has an Illegal Operation, or doesn't log onto the Internet," Firera said. Marill appeared.

"Hey it wasn't me that swore at the computer and raised an axe at it," Marill said.

"But it was you," Firera said.

"Will you go away now?" Tom asked. Firera snatched the notepad off Marill and started writing. Tom disappeared and reappeared in Sickbay, he saw an hypospray and injected himself with it.

_"Paris to Bridge. The Captain's beaten me to it_."

"What! How can that happen again?" Marill exclaimed.

"Why the hell does she keep doing it?" Firera asked angrily. Firera started writing again. Tom activated the Doctor and then injected himself with what was left of the Doctor's experiment.

_"Computer, activate the EMH."_

_"Please state the nature of the medical...Mr Paris, what are you doing with my experiment?"_

_"I can't help it Doc, that new writer is forcing me to do it, aaagh!"_

"Firera, what about the Captain, we have to torment her in the Year Of Hell episode," Marill asked.

"So you said the last time," Firera moaned.

"Oh come on Firera, make an effort, this hasn't happened before, remember?" Marill said.

"Of course it has," Firera said as she continued writing on the notepad. Kes was called to Sickbay but because of her increasing telepathic powers she had thought up a promising way to save Kathryn's life.

"And Tom's," Marill said.

"Oh fine, we can torment him next episode," Firera said.

**Meanwhile in Sickbay**:  
Kes walked into Sickbay.

"What happened, Doctor?" Kes asked.

"Suicide attempts I would think," the Doctor replied. An alarm went off near Kathryn's bio bed. Kes and the Doctor ran over to her.

_"Web Express has performed an Illegal Operation!"_

"AAAAGGHH! NOT AGAIN!" Marill yelled. Axe ready.

"Hey, it was this point it crashed last time!" Firera exclaimed.

_"Only Kidding!"_

"Her blood pressure is dropping, Doctor!" Kes exclaimed. The Doctor picked up a hypo spray from the Instrument tray and he injected it in Kathryn's neck.

"No affect," the Doctor muttered. Kes stared at the bio bed console.

"Wait, Doctor, I can see it," Kes muttered.

"See what?" the Doctor asked.

"I know what the problem is Doctor. We have to transport the baby out," Kes said.

_"Oh yeah, I forgot about that," Marill's voice said._

_"Shut up!" Firera's voice said._

"Why?" the Doctor asked.

"Because whatever she injected herself with is killing the baby and it's causing her blood pressure to drop," Kes replied.

"Alright, prepare for a fetal transport," the Doctor said.

_"What's that?" Marill's voice asked._

_"I don't know, it was mentioned in Deadlock the episode when Naomi was born_,_" Firera's voice replied._

_"Oh yeah," Marill's voice said._

"Locking on...energizing," Kes said as she worked on the console.

_"Er..._ _Firera, where's Chakotay at?" Marill's voice asked._

_"Oh crap, er I'll sort that out," Firera's voice said._

Chakotay, who had been in Sickbay ever since Tom injected himself with the hypospray, decided to say something so somebody would notice him.

"What's going on, Doc?" he asked.

"You know what's going on," the Doctor moaned.

"I know, I just wanted to get some attention," Chakotay said.

"Doctor, the transport was successful, her blood pressure is rising again," Kes said.

"Good," the Doctor said. He and Chakotay walked up to Kes who was holding the baby.

"Congratulations, Commander, it's a girl," Kes said. Naomi ran into Sickbay.

"Yey! A friend!" she yelled. Samantha walked in and picked Naomi up.

"C'mon, you're suppose to be in bed," she said as she walked out. Meanwhile Tom was in extreme pain.

_"Firera, can't you stop tormenting him for a while," Marill's voice said._

_"Fine! I'm totally sick of this!" Firera's voice said_.

**Two days later:**  
**_Security Chief's_** **_Log Stardate 50???.?: Life onboard Voyager is slowly returning to normal. The two writers have finally left us alone for the time being, much to the relief of the entire crew. On another note, our new crewmember, Seven Of Nine, has been released from Sickbay. On another note the Captain & Chakotay's baby girl has been named Kiara Morgan Janeway._**

**The Mess Hall:**  
"Kiara, where did you get that name from?" Kathryn asked.

"Oh, it's from a 20th century film called Lion King 2. You see, Kiara was the daughter of Simba. She fell in love with the heir of another pride and they both brought the two prides together as one pride," Tom replied.

"I like that name," Naomi said.

"The point is Naomi, that Kiara is an appropriate name for the daughter of two leaders of two different, factions, am I making any sense here?" Tom asked.

"Sort of," Chakotay said.

"Where did the Morgan part come from...oh that Captain who sounds like Sideshow Bob from the Simpsons," Tom said.

"Who, what?" Chakotay asked.

"Doesn't matter," Tom replied.

"I miss Kes," Naomi moaned.

"We all do, Naomi," Kathryn said.

**THE END**


End file.
